My doctor says she’s still concern about my weight. She said that I probably could get off of some of the medications that I take if only I would lose some weight. I know what I have to do I just can’t make myself motivated enough to care. To be honest, sometimes the thought of adding 30 to 40 more years to my life is scary to me because that is there is a 40 years pain. Who in the right mind would put themselves through that on purpose? I’m not suicidal, I will live as long as God wants me to, but to purposely and 30 to 40 more years to my life sounds crazy to me. I wish I could find how reasons see you ignite that’s the spark for the life I had once.
I decided to keep going to Voices to workout. Stephanie assured me I am making small gains. I was able to open the refrigerator by myself. Plus it gives an excuse to get out of this hell hole of a building. I love the exercise bike. I need upper body strength. I think we get to a place where we all want to give up, but we can’t. We got to push through, so we can persevere.
I want you to take something positive from this blog. Even if you decide things I do are not right, you can use me as a example of what not to do in your life. I just want you to know that we are all struggling with something, and when I find a little little trick that makes life easier I want to pass it along. I will like to show you when I get down some , because we all go do it. I want you to know how grateful I am that you all have decided to come along on this journey with me. I did not get any comments, but I got a lot of likes for my feedback request, so I am going to take that as a sign keep going.
Depression is nothing more than the enemy trying to steal you’re light and connection to God. The devil wants to where you down like a deer; he wants to where you down before he goes in for The Kill. The Devil wants to fill your brain constant negativity, so he can kill your spirit. That’s why the Devil put these negative thoughts on a constant loop.
We all have an internal dialogue with ourselves about ourselves constantly throughout the day. The fact is that most people can more easily believe something negative about themselves. A positive notion needs constant repetitive reinforcement. A negative notion will turn your brain into a broken record stuck on repeat. The stones you cast towards a person has the potential effect the person’s personal truth about themselves. Words are weapons and when you fire them carelessly, you can emotionally kill them for a lifetime from one moment. Words can inspire suicidal thoughts and actions.
Depression is like having a very loud drill-sergeant in your head telling you that you are worthless 24-7. Imagine everything you ever thought negative about yourself repeating over and over again. Most of us never stop to think what another person might be going though. Words are often chosen thoughtlessly.
Right now I have a PCA that is exaggerating her credentials. I believe this woman is a pathological liar. This woman says she is a nurse and has special credentials in trek care and feeding tube care. She also claims she used to drive for the emta lift service, which is our door to door bus service. You mean to tell me you have all these credentials, but you taken a job as a professional ass wiper. This weekend she told me that she could not work for me , because her back hurts from the accident that she got into with the company van. I naturally called the company to find out more about this accident and her injuries and they said that the van has not been driven for a while and there are no reported accidents. This lady also Clans to know the company director and he has stated then he does not know her and does not have any personal communication with her. Since day one she has claimed to have Tim’s personal number , but he has stated that he would never give his personal number out to anyone.
I feel that one biggest problems in dealing with personal caregivers, you can never be honest about how you feel. If you tell your personal caregiver they are not your friend, they act all wounded, but when you act as their friend you must have an attachment disorder. Don’t ever tell your caregiver that you get lonely, because they will look at you like a sexual criminal.
By Dr. Perry, PhD “Most people would rather be certain they’re miserable, than risk being happy.” ~Dr. Robert Anthony 1. Spend money on experience, not things Happy people tend to spend money on experience more than on things. Of course, there are daily necessities that we need in order to function. But, at the end of the […]